Yesterday, on the girls’ Fall Break, we spent the day at the zoo with some good friends. It was a gorgeous fall day, literally a breath of fresh air after our hundred degree August/September heat wave, and the animals were the most active I can ever remember seeing them. Observing the beauty of God’s creation under a sparkling blue sky and watching my girls play with my lifelong best friends’ kids with an unbridled excitement and innocence (and loudness, SO very loud LOL) as only children have… it left me with a feeling of life and lightness that’s stuck with me through today, back into the grind of our “normal” everyday life.

Each time the seasons change is a new opportunity to come alive, to examine whether we’re living this one life we’ve been graciously given with a spirit of thriving or just surviving. Last night, I went to bed completely exhausted but also with a mind and heart full of ideas jotted into a note on my phone… ideas and dreams for my Created business, for our family, for myself.

This morning, I woke up ready to run! A couple of years ago, this would’ve been a normal morning for me. But over the past year, as I’ve worked hard to raise my super low iron (and energy) levels, I’d temporarily given up running after reading that some runners are prone to low ferritin. After getting my most recent lab results a few days ago, I found that despite my best efforts, my level had not increased and had actually dropped a couple points back into the single digits (sigh). While I’ll continue to do all I can to increase my iron (under the supervision of a wonderful functional MD who’s helping identify/treat some root cause issues), not running will no longer be a part of that plan. Because, while I’m not the best or fastest, running is a part of who I am - I feel like “me” when I run! And as long as the Lord gives me breath in my lungs and legs that move, I plan to run - not every day, not marathon mileage - but enough to stay in shape to do a 5K if or when I feel like it. So today, I willed myself to run one mile at a 10-minute pace (which felt more like a sub-8 pace LOL), and while it certainly wasn’t pretty or effortless, I rode that amazing runner’s high the rest of the morning and carried a feeling of accomplishment with me throughout the rest of the day.

That single, unimpressive mile somehow represented the beginning of something new... a fresh focus on faith over fear.

This fall marks the beginning of a new season for our family. After ten years of working diligently (translation - early mornings, late nights, weekends) to build a successful IT consulting business, Jeff has resigned from his job at UA to pursue this venture full-time, beginning in early November. That same week, I’ll be starting a new job at UA, after following the Lord’s leading for me to be home part time the past two years. We have prayed for these opportunities for awhile now, and the Lord has been so faithful to not only answer our prayers, but also to grow us greatly in Him through some pretty intense trials during the past couple of years. Whenever the Lord calls us to do something, I’m slowly learning He will be faithful to do a work in us before He will do a work through us. I tend to want to skip straight ahead to the exciting outcome-based stuff, but His molding and shaping in the messy process is essential both for our good and His glory. (Maybe one day I’ll finally learn that lesson and stop being surprised by the trials, haha!).

While exciting, I’ve never really liked new beginnings and transitions… my personality prefers routine, predictability, and comfort. I guess that’s true for most of us, right? But the longer I walk with the Lord, I’m learning that’s not usually His way. He calls us to trust, to step out in faith when and where He calls. We aren’t entitled to see the big picture but simply to take the next step in obedience, as it is revealed. As we prepare to begin this new season, the phrase “cautiously excited” seems best to describe my feelings. On one hand, I am overwhelmingly grateful to the Lord for His providence in His perfect timing. On the other hand, I’m fighting feelings of fear… Can I return to a full time workload again and be the kind of mom I want to be? How much time will I have left to devote to my new business that I feel the Lord has called me to pursue? What will Jeff’s new schedule look like, and how does that impact our family’s schedule? Questions, questions… the temptations to worry and control are real, especially for us Enneagram 1 folks (Anyone with me?).

BUT we were not called to fear, but to faith… I remind myself again and again, as I constantly give these and lots of other things back to the Lord, again and again. These are truly minor fears - about blessings, first world problems - to even have career choices, to have the means to provide for our families with jobs that we actually enjoy. But isn’t that what the enemy does? He takes good things and tempts us to doubt the Lord’s goodness in them - to doubt whether He can really be trusted. (Spoiler alert… He absolutely can!) When fear comes calling louder than usual in times of transition, it simply means I have to put on the armor of God offensively rather that defensively - to proactively renew my mind and heart through the Truth of His Word and through continual prayer and worship. Then, and only then, will I have any chance of being victorious in the war against worry.

Thinking back to my morning run, I know without a doubt my 18-year-old self in top cross country training shape would laugh hysterically at my 37-year-old self huffing and puffing to struggle through a mile. But this older version of myself - in a body that has birthed two babies and walked through quite a few valleys and mountaintops too - has gained a little wisdom and perspective to share with that younger, athletic, dream-filled college freshman…

When faced with new beginnings, transitions, and fear, you can never go wrong with these three actions:

1. Put on the full armor of God.

2. Focus on taking the next step in faith.

3. Do something that makes you feel like “you.” And if (when), in all the crazy obligations of life, you forget who you even are anymore, take time to remember and rediscover that girl you used to be. She’s worth it!

Today I’m choosing to step - no, RUN - into this new season with a renewed focus on faith over fear… knowing I’ll have to make that same choice again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Believing I am created to create and to inspire other women to do the same is only possible when I choose continually to ignore the creeping fears and lean into the Lord’s faithfulness!

Ever thankful that “The one who calls you is faithful, and He will do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:24), and even “if we are faithless, He remains faithful—for He cannot deny himself” (2 Timothy 2:13). Praise Him!!

Which part of this resonates with you in this current season of your life?

What immediate next step can you take to do something that makes you feel like “you?”

Just in case you ever question whether I’m keeping it real, here’s a sweaty, no-makeup post-run selfie for reassurance! ;)